Quiet moments in March

Where my quiet(er) one goes for a little study solitude. She recharges on Saturdays. If she has nowhere in particular to go, I may see her only at mealtimes as she busies herself in her room or on the swing on the back porch. The others seem more magnetized to me and I sometimes find myself seeking alone time too.

 

 

Just looking. Discovering that I could get as much enjoyment out of this picture I snapped of an antique typewriter as I would if I actually bought it and displayed it in our guest room on our antique school desk. I am drawn to old things. At an antique boutique today I roamed the aisles in silence and discovered very old copies of Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights. I liked looking at the woodcut engravings and seeing the brown ink calligraphy of the woman's name inscribed inside them. I thought about buying these too and then decided it was enough to simply look, enjoy, and move on.

 

 

Bath time solitude. This evening will be carpool and cooking and laundry and ball games. But this hour of quiet is a warm bath, sunshine, and candlelight. I equally love spring sunshine streaming through glass windows and the perfume of candles filling the air. (The candles disagree with my man's nose, so I try to remember to use them when he is away at work.)

 

Lotions and potions. Resolve to use up the hand creams, lip glosses, and such received as gifts before indulging in any other spa or beauty products. (With the exception of the two dollar eyeliners found on sale at Ulta. A deal is a deal!)

Tea time. The gift of a raspberry scone sent home from my mother-in-law. Jasmine tea leaves contained in a tea ball. Resolve to use up the teas I already have in the cabinet before I buy new boxes of the ones I know I like. Plans to take our girls to tea together some day soon.

Reading a series with my kids. Stealing the book back and forth from one another as we steal moments alone to finish a few chapters.

Listening to a story on CD in the commutes when we run out of things to talk about after exchanging details of the day.

 

Leprechauns, Shiners, and Hair

Here are a few snapshots of what our lives have looked like in March.

Great prayers of gratitude for the sparing of my son's vision when a teammate carelessly swung a metal baseball bat into his eye at batting practice. It stayed swollen shut for four days, but B enjoyed celebrity status at school in the baseball safety lessons in P. E.

All smiles...boys recover more quickly from their injuries than their mothers!

Mom and me date to a little cafe

Twelve year old girl hormones and obsessions. Needing just the right product to ensure middle school beauty.

 

Dreams of going West one day with the family. Surfing the internet for dream vacation logistics.

 

 

 

Researching healthy recipes and healthy moves for my classes. Telling myself that I MUST STOP obsessively pinning things ...just one more...just one more...and actually try out more of the ideas. Gathering ideas has an addictive pull over me...like mind crack. I'm slower on the implementation.

 

Taking a magically delicious break from healthy eating over the weekend. The kids were less than enthused about the 3/4 cup portion control baggies I measured out after the first box hit the recycle bin after a day. (This was also to ensure that the same mystery kid who helped himself/herself to the gold coins placed upon nicely made beds didn't also pilfer out all the marshmallows and leave behind a box of oats!)

Ole! Enjoying building community in our new Sunday School class. The kind of community that can send out an S.O.S. on the difficult days when we yell at our kids and need help. The kind of community that calls to see how your kid is when they heard the news about the accident. The kind of community that says "Hey! Isn't it about time to plan another girls night/guys night/couples night/family night?

 

Parenting is not for Sissies

 

Some days are all smiles and sunshine. The ones we capture digitally and remember forever. Some we hope are washed permanently into the sea of forgetfulness. We have had several less-than-stellar days lately and are redirected to call upon Jesus to help us parent well instead of relying on our own strength or perceived wisdom.

 

I am on my face again as a mom of five. I recently screamed at my bickering children and slammed my hand against the dashboard (while slamming on the brakes) to squash them into silent submission. Their bickering stopped in stunned silence, but this was not the family harmony I am praying for. Enforced silence - not hearts overflowing with gratitude and respect. Toes drawing lines in the sand. The silence of "if you have nothing kind to say, you will say nothing at all."

Our normal routine is to read from a devotional on the way to school. Things were a little different as we had an extra child with a different school schedule, and we needed to trade cars with my husband for repairs and didn't have the routine devotional with us. One step out of routine and this band of ruffians was thrown for a quarrelsome loop.

Having just read a link from a Christian school to a Christain family website on how to train your Christian kids from whining to gratitude, I pulled out the suggestion of "How many things can we count that we are grateful for on the ten minute drive to school?" This seemed like a Mary Poppins magical good idea. We have even done this before with no issues. This day, however, my children erupted into great theological controversy over whether Jesus and God were the same answer and began fighting one another in the desire to be right instead of counting any of their blessings.

And so my parenting tirade began.

Why is it that when your intent is to point others to a love for Jesus, you end up showing disrespect yourself and bad manners? I did apologize to the one non-fighting kid. I hoped to gather up enough calm to apologize to the others when they returned home from school. Only the teachers in the carpool line wished them a good day. I was still too angry. I prayed at the curb that we would learn to love each other and treat each other well. I thanked God for giving us fresh starts from bad ones. That's as far as I could go. And in His grace, he gave us another day to learn how to be a family. A family that blows up and blows it, and asks forgiveness, and starts again.

Father, help my children learn to live peaceably with one another and not have such a deep desire to be first, right, and argumentative. Help me parent from a place of calm and not indignation. Make us fiercely devoted to You and one another...and not just fierce.

 

Making friends with cauliflower

So here's where I am at the end of the first month of clean-er eating and cooking for my family. I have traveled the following emotional journey:

Stage one: I can't stand YOU. Don't even talk to me about this. Pull the covers over my head and shut down in stormy silence. Emotional triggers from anorexic days and general unhappiness.

Stage two: I can't stand THIS. This is ridiculous. No, we do not need to invest in a professional grade blender yet. But, I love YOU and recognize that some changes need to be made. I will try.

Stage three: Where do you find arrowroot powder anyway? First forays into terra incognita.

Stage four: Flegling experimentation in the kitchen. I feel like I am camping in tents with the exilic Israelites each night I turn out a new dinner concoction. Manna from heaven meets the response, "What is this?"

 

Stage five: Find myself browsing pin boards for new recipes and ideas in my spare moments, and making lists of what I'd like to try in the kitchen on the weekends. Learn to "rice" cauliflower, and experiment with desserts made of egg whites, xylitol, and almond flour. We like "thin mints" that are actually thin. Happy to know that my man is finding success with the new program, and some relief from some health concerns.

I wonder if stage six will be my kids' compliance? My daughter asked if she could give up exercise for Lent, so we're not quite there yet, but we have made a few steps in a healthier direction, and for that, I am thankful.

 

Irish Eyes are Smiling

My husband has planned a fifteenth anniversary trip to Ireland. I have long been drawn to the magical mystical Emerald Isle, and we are going to visit next month (with only one teeny stopover for business). In preparation for this trip, I have been checking out children's books on the history and culture of Ireland to try and get a quick overview, if not up to speed, on all things Irish.

 

Today, Mom and I went to see Celtic Woman to celebrate her birthday (and as a tiny thank you for her beautiful willingness to stay with the grandkids while we are away). We listened to an amazing dancing fiddler. We heard transcendent songs of beauty accompanied by the harp and drums. We tapped our toes and did a little jig in our seats, wishing we knew how to Riverdance. We felt the call of ancient mother lands. (She is a McFarland, and my husband comes from the Fitzpatricks. My cousin played the "Amazing Grace" on the bagpipes at our wedding. You get the picture.)

I couldn't resist Target bin leprechaun mustaches for the boys for St. Patrick's day, and been so impressed with the life of a person that was about self-sacrifice to bring the gospel to the people that had enslaved him (and not about green beer).

 

I see the Cliffs of Moher in the scene when Harry Potter and Dumbledore search for the horcruxes.

I feel solidarity with the feisty rough-and-tumble who are not afraid to engage when necessary.

And we haven't even set foot on the island yet.

 

My favorite hymn reaches back to the 8th century...and was translated from Irish.

"Be Thou My Vision"

Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart

Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art

Thou my best thought by day or by night

Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light

Be thou my wisdom and Thou my true word

I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord

Thou my great Father, I, Thy true son

Thou in me dwelling and I with Thee one

Riches I heed not nor man's empty praise

Thou mine inheritance now and always

Thou and thou only first in my heart

High King of heaven my treasure Thou are

High King of heaven my victory won

May I reach heaven's joys, O bright heaven's Sun

Heart of my own heart whatever befall

Still be my vision O Ruler of all.

 

Spring has Sprung

 

We are in that crazy in-between time in South Carolina weather where it's 80 degrees one weekend and below freezing the next. As I said my prayers of gratitude last night, I included "not sitting on metal bleachers for 4 hours in freezing temperatures" as the boys games were rescheduled.

Sunday, I got a bit of a sunburn dining alfresco with "my" college girls. Tuesday, I wore my thermal underwear in the house. We see the slightest hint of yellow pollen on porches and try to grasp the beauty before the season comes into full bloom (and around-the-clock allergy medications).

We turn our eyes towards the Easter season, but keep our winter jackets hanging nearby just in case.

 

Color Me Healthy

Today I ran the Color Run with my fitness friend. We try to have fitness adventures ever so often to keep ourselves motivated.

We have no idea who these people are behind us!

We stopped off at Whole Foods on the way home to gather earthy goodness. Whereas I feel in my element dancing, moving, or working out, I feel at the starting line when it comes to the in' s and out's of my man's new nutritional plan.

Sometimes it feels like that in my walk with God too. I'll have the Bible study part of my devotional time going well, but the intercessory prayer part feels sluggish. Or, I'll love serving at church one week, and feel overwhelmed the next. Thankfully, walking (and running) with Jesus is one step at a time. And there's a party at the finish line!