Moments

Will's first game...suited up, ready to be a part of the team.

He seemed most excited about going to the snack bar, but did a good job of throwing the ball back to the pitchers mound. We were pleasantly surprised.

My five very smart children simply could not get the hang of smiling through the valentine heart opening, so this picture didn't make any great grandparent cards....We tried, but then gave up and laid down on the floor instead.

 

 

Running on empty...I prayed my way to the kids school today, and rolled into a gas station dead on empty, thankful that I didn't need to hike home. Noticing that I need to dust the dashboard!

Noticing the bulbs that are starting to poke up in our flower beds.

 

Cheers!

Cute idea pinned from Pinterest.

 

I have a weakness for seasonal clearance items. I figure as long as there is still love to share, it's okay to keep going with the Valentine's spirit....especially at a deep discount.

The kids loved their after school snack...which they could treat themselves to once their junk was picked up off their bedroom floors.

Here's to good times and clean rooms

These are Valentine chocolate coins from World Market, but you could easily sharpie a few red hearts on the regular kind at other times of the year (or add a sticker). Today we practiced secrecy in our acts of kindness to one another. The challenge was for each kid to see a job that needed to be done and secretly serve his brother or sister without blowing the trumpets about it for recognition. Anyone who could whisper in my ear what he or she had done for another family member would receive a "love token" chocolate coin. They really liked this and carried book bags and shoes for one another, made each others' beds, picked up random stuff left lying around, and helped younger kids with challenging tasks such as opening bottlecaps. It made my heart warm. I think we'll keep this up until we run though the bag of coins. Maybe one day it will be more automatic without an external motivator, but until then, we PRACTICE kindness.

 

Love until the end

 

John.13.1

It was before Passover, and Jesus knew that the time had come for Him to leave this world and to return to the Father.

He had always loved His followers in this world, and He loved them until the very end.

It's only 7:15am, and I don't think I am going to make loving until 8:30 tonight, much less until the very end. My boys have already lost their dollar for the day for incessant teasing and rough-housing. Two times one of my kids has stormed up the steps in anger and frustration at a brother or sister ...and we're not yet through breakfast.

Loving until the very end takes fierce determination.

Maybe I should pack this center note in my own lunchbox today:

Jesus will help you do whatever is too hard for you today.

It's a little bit embarrassing to admit when I want to masquerade as a good mom, but somedays enjoying my children in their grumpiness is a little too hard for me to do on my own. When they are storming over who sits where in the minivan, a dark cloud threatens to envelop us all. He is reminding me that I have a choice of whether or not to be sucked into the dark hole of crossed arms, pouty faces, and scowls. He reminds me to call out for help. "God, You love these kids more than I ever could on their best days and their worst moments. Help me train them up when they are being hateful to one another. Help me to respond and not react. Help me not wish I were a hermit in the mountains today."

Can't have enough reminders around the house. Maybe I'll try the phylactery approach next and sharpie some scriptures on our foreheads.

Rainy Day

Banana and Nutella or strawberry, blackberry, blueberry crepes for breakfast....

 

The sleepover guests have returned to their own homes, leaving us with only our seven family members, and it seems strangely quiet. I take it that they enjoyed their stay as they kept hiding whenever one of the moms would come to the door to pick one of them up. I found guests squooshed up in closets and cabinets in a great game of rainy day hide-and-seek. I am thankful that my middle schooler has found a good group of girls to journey with her through these crazy years.

Because I personally did not leave the house to take anyone to a music lesson or a ball practice, the day seems like an extra long one. We cleaned up after the party guests, made lunch, did laundry, and then settled down into our various media escapes. I read the fourth Peter and the Starcatchers book and did my PT on my pulled hamstring. I felt a little guilty about not interacting much with my children, but they were happily watching movies, TV episodes, playing on the computer or their personal electronics. It poured all day, so A took B out to the batting cages, but the rest of us were slugs. L and I managed to walk on the treadmill while watching movies, but it wasn't a very productive day.

I feel a little guilty about this, especially as I moved to three different rooms throughout the afternoon in order to find a space where I could finish my book alone. I have to remind myself that that is ok on a rainy Saturday every now and then. Rest is good. Lazy days in our cozy pants are ok and needed. Permissible AND beneficial from time to time.

Tomorrow will provide more opportunities for hosting and ministry and kid interaction. Today we might just reheat those pizzas we made or grab a bowl of cereal. Sounds like my man has already opted for cereal from the clanking sounds I hear from the kitchen. I bet he found the Lucky Charms I stashed for the St. Patrick's Day sleepover with the sixth grade girls from church.

I think Jesus may have enjoyed hanging out at the home of Lazarus, Mary, and Martha in his cozy lounge pants/robes too on occasion. Sabbath rest.

 

Gestures of kindness

Most days, I'm trying to be a decent mom by not blowing off steam when I see another pair of sneakers left out in the rain by the trampoline. But, every once in a while, I move beyond not yelling, to actually offering a gesture of kindness. Small simple things. This half dozen roses was $3.99 at Aldi. I gave each of my family one in a recycled apple cider or Cracker Barrel syrup "vase". They were a hit.

 

Another silly idea is to replenish the bananas and leave a note that says "I love you bunches". Now that we are a family of seven, we go through a serious amount of fruit, so I make an Aldi run each week, just for produce. After a few days of going without bananas, my family feels loved when they miraculously reappear!

Taking a meal to a family that just had a baby. Holding the new snuggle-bug and listening to the little newborn sounds that you forget about. Takethemameal is a great free website for organizing meal trains.

Being part of a Sunday School class that looks after one another. "You did it for Me."

Having heart-friends in ministry leadership that you can call and plead/coerce to serve alongside you, even when the weather is grey, and freezing, and rainy and no one really wants to go and do the thing that needs to be done. Together, we do it anyway, and it turns out fine, and our grey attitudes recover.

 

Saying "yes" to the chaos of giggly middle school sleepovers when there's already five kids at home. After a bout of sheer craziness they're actually settling down quite nicely watching movies and eating popcorn. I had my pajamas on by 8:30pm. I'm not sure how much sleeping was going on upstairs, but the girls had a good time.

This was a big step for us as the girls did all the planning and arranging themselves. We parents met on my doorstep and got to know each other as the girls brushed past us and went on with their evening. Gone are the days of knowing everything about all your kids' friends. I had a clipboard and was trying to take down parents' phone numbers even though a few of the kids had their own cell phones. I am happy that they want to be here with us and look forward to getting to know this fabulous five even better over the next three years that is middle school. Now to remember who is allergic to peanuts, intolerant to dairy, and not a fan of chocolate.....

Whoops, spoke too soon. The nine kids have figured out that hide and seek in the dark squealing is more fun than watching a movie, so I will need to go squelch some joy until tomorrow morning. (smiles)

 

Loving with His words

John.12.49


"I say only what the Father has asked me to say."

His words. Not mine.

Challenging.

I don't think his words would sting or try to subdue. He had perfect authority, yet did not need to wield his power. He gave thought to what came out of His mouth, not reacting in frustration or exasperation.

Show me how to speak your words, in your tone today, even when (several) loved ones wake up on the grumpy side of the bed....even when the kids fight over which lunchbox to use (again), even when they fight over whose turn it is....to read the devotional!!!

From The Love Dare, pinned from Pinterest

Challenged to not only refrain from speaking negatively, but also offer an "unexpected gesture" of kindness.

 

 

Love is not....

Woe to you Pharisees (Davis kids)!

For you love the front seat in the synagogue (minivan).

Luke 11:43

 

Love is NOT fighting over the front seat, or the best glass of sparkling grape juice, or the biggest piece of pizza.

The above verse is now slid into the visor on the "shotgun" seat in the van. When squabbles arise, we pause and think about the root cause of our fighting. I'm not sure that this is helping soften and change hearts any more than the rotating seating chart is, but again, I hope that one day, they will stop and consider others, and not only grasping for all that they can for themselves.

May we all avoid the "what sorrow awaits you" woe cautioned by Jesus.

 

Celebrations

Love is... A few cookies and some sparkling red grape juice.

We are trying to reflect on how we have seen kindness (or given kindness) to the world. After dinner, or after school, we "celebrate" the good.

I don't know that they will remember any of this when they are grown, but I pray a few seeds will take root in their hearts, and they will stop to consider how any given day might be of use to the One who loves them and gave Himself for them.

Love is a pair of pliers

 

Love is a pair of pliers aptly applied to a stubborn earring in loving Daddy hands.

I fall in love with my husband over and over again as we make these midnight operations together while our children sleep. It was time for MJ to take out her first pair of pierced earrings, but one earring was very stubbornly secure in her ear. Once she fell asleep my husband took out the pliers and fixed the problem. He told her that the earring fairy had come the next morning.

I have held the flashlight while splinters have come out of grubby summer feet.

I have looked away as stubborn baby teeth were ganked from my children's mouths at the hand of a grubby pair of pliers. Even though Daddy methodology is not always the same as Mommy sensibilities, I am appreciative of the need for both. They get the job done with minimal fear and wailing.

 

 

 

Serve one another in love

I received a quick Facebook message from an old college friend that ended with "praying for the grace to serve your family". This resonated with me as I have been trying not just to serve, but to serve in love. To serve with a happy heart, not just dutifully.

Yesterday the girls snuck over to several neighbors' driveways and colored Valentine messages in chalk on their driveways. I got to peek out the window and see one neighbor stop and admire their handiwork as she stepped out for an afternoon walk. I was proud that they are learning to think of someone other than themselves, even if in the smallest of ways.

 

The need for instruction and correction has not stopped, but God is trying to soften my tone and volume, and the erase the grimaces on my face as I remind our children what is expected and what is unacceptable.

A lullaby version of a Navigators praise song returned to my memory today. When I nannied in France one summer after college, the mom in the family I lived with would sing this song over her kids as they went to sleep. Now if I can just remember in the heat of the corrective moment.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God. Let me be like you in all your ways.

Teach me your truth, teach me your song. Shelter me in the shadow of your wings.

For we are your righteousness, if we die to ourselves, and live through your death. We shall be born again to be blessed by your love."

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=P3AUQnko9sY&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DP3AUQnko9sY

 

What love looks like

A little something useful and a little something sweet looks like a lot times seven.

This year our valentines to each other included:

Help and supplies to create an edible 3-D model of a cell before AWANAS/youth group

Sharing of sentiments and custom built "Lego dudes" in the journals we keep in lieu of cards to each other.

Off to a good start in the recycled heart-shaped crayon Pinterest craft

Whoops. I don't think I should have cooled these recycled crayons in the fridge. I think they separated, but the first grade class will probably like them anyway. I will include a note that they are NOT candy. A mouthful of wax would be unpleasant.

Trying to love (the teachers) within the healthy treat policy that our elementary school strictly enforces.

Pink milk like Charlie and Lola

Cooking breakfast...which I NEVER do before school. A plate of bacon hearts speaks love to my man...and still making it in time to Munchies with Mom at school.

Decor humor

Appreciating the fact that I can ask my man for a flowering plant that lasts a month instead of the traditional roses that everyone else wants, and that he will drive around town searching for one on the 14th!

I like roses, just not red ones on Valentine's day.

Trying to honor Jesus in my attitude when one kid is happy with his gift...until he sees his brother's gift.

Only blowing it once when one of the girls snarks at another girl. Resolve not to model any snarky attitudes of my own tomorrow.

Enjoying my Mom's company for dinner and appreciating the many (adult) hands makes light work in the rapid kitchen clean-up.

Thankful to be able to love.

 

 

Kind and Generous

Today I learned the name of the crossing guard at our middle school. I had been given a gift card to Starbucks and (after treating myself to a coffee) picked up a few Valentines cake pops to hand out to those teachers who unfortunately had carpool duty on a dreary, rainy, afternoon. As I reflected on how good it made me feel to surprise a few others with a small act of kindness, I began to think through what my Lenten offering could be.

I long to be consistently kind and generous, but without God's help, I am really neither. I like quiet, and order, and cleanliness, and peace. I like to give and make others happy, but I really don't like it when others' irresponsible behavior makes me unhappy.

I can be kind in a bubble, when no one is irritable around me, when there are no loud noises or disagreements, and no one needs anything of me. Those moments at this stage in life are few and far-between. I am asking the Lord to grow me, and make me more spirit-controlled, and less reactionary to the bazillion little fires that need to be straightened out in a day.

Although our family does not formally observe Lent, I have been thinking about what I might be able to offer Jesus in response to His sacrifice. I think he wants me to give him something that will cost me something. I love sweet things, but if I am not careful, my dietary restrictions turn more into checking the scale than checking my spirit to see if there is any progress.

My preteen quipped that she has thought about giving up exercising, but as she is no fan of exercise as it is, I tried to convince her to consider another more meaningful gift. Not giving up sugar or even cheese (as we discovered two school friends have, thus thwarting our upcoming pizza and nutella crepes sleepover menus). Something that would mean something to her.

As we drove around the city doing little random acts of kindness, it dawned on me that Jesus would have me give up fussing and nagging our kids for 40 days. He is leading me to step back from grouchiness and practice a little more kindness for a season. If I can delight in being kind to a stranger, I should eventually be able to learn how to be more kind to those I live with.

Don't get me wrong. I don't take pleasure in fuming, but I very much like order (and control). If I don't stay on top of things, lunches get left in the van, kids go to school in shorts on freezing days, and all the tennis shoes are soaked from being left out in the rain by the trampoline. Yet, I sense that there may be a better way than my constant reminders and redirections. I don't know what that way is, perhaps lessons learned through natural consequences? Perhaps some sort of written chart or checklist that can speak instead of me? We'll see what is in store.

Ash Wednesday...one day's offering.

What counts is faith expressing itself through love. Galatians 5:6b

 

Frozen peas, please

This weekend has been full. A medical procedure that knocked one of us off of the driving route for the weekend. Three basketball games, two baseball practices, one middle school interview with an impromptu reunion of fellow teachers, pilates members and church members who also want their kids to go to the same magnet program; one monster truck rally and first sleepover with a friend, one 25th ballet company reunion and little girls night to the ballet, one riotous Sunday School filled with laughter, one meeting on planning for future Sunday Schools, one kids cereal and pajama day at church with mismatched pajamas, and one youth discipleship...and two of us wrestling with a feverish bout with something gut-clenching viral.

The questions come. "Mom, can you take me to the store to buy Valentines? Can you....?" Ummm, no. Mommy's taking a break to do some Sabbath laundry hiding in her room. One cartoon rented off of Apple TV watched three times by the kids. That's all the parenting we have left in us today.

Uncle Haden hangs out with us during the three back-to-back games on Saturday morning.

It was fun to see the same choreography that we performed alive and well today by future generations of dancers. The third shade variation from La Bayadere is much as I remembered it. The evening made me very thankful for my dance training which I am able to share with my church from time to time.

 

Lost and Found

Sometimes I am astounded at the sheer number of little details in a family's life. I do not run businesses or speak to thousands, and yet God has given me jobs to do....many small things that add up to a full life.

FIND:

White straight-legged baseball pants with a red stripe and grey baseball pants with belt-loops

 

Determine which cleats worn by big brother now fit little brother

Find black shoelaces to replace the ones shredded by first grade boy

B's library book, M's library book

N's math homework and missing AWANA book

MJ's missing iPod

A gift and card for the birthday sleepover she's been invited to

African things for L's presentation at school

Can goods to contribute to the Boy Scouts drive for hunger

 

Time to eat lunch with my Mom, make a Valentine for my aunt, and write a thank you card for the hostess flowers someone generously brought, text a sick friend to make sure she is ok while her husband is away on business

Time to make a new playlist and learn some new choreography for my Pilates and Zumba classes.

Find the slip of paper with a new member's name on it. Call her by name and thank her for coming.

Find S's missing football, the E's missing basketball, a black shawl, and a white towel left behind at our house from Sunday's Super Bowl party. Drop off recycled 2 liter bottles for a friend's art lesson.

Pick up tickets to the Carolina Ballet's 25 anniversary show Saturday, contact old dancing friends for a reunion

Pick up x-rays and MRIs for A and reschedule my PT after receiving a message that they had made a clerical error. Find grace in my heart for receptionist. Reason that two weeks is not that long to wait for an injury that was made two years ago.

Make sure that there are frozen peas and Moose Tracks ice cream in the freezer.

Find something special beyond chocolate for each of my babies for Valentine's day.

Resolve not to lose my temper again when the kids are fighting over where to sit in the van, or who gets to use which lunchbox. Resolve not to go berserk (again) when they are sitting around playing video games instead of putting their shoes on and packing their lunches for school.

Find the next book in the series Peter and the Starcatchers that we have been listening to in the van.

Find the teeny tiny stars that are supposed to be ironed on to the basketball uniforms before the next games.

Find old contact information for a (another) background security check to volunteer as a host home for the sixth grade girls in the youth group.

Sometimes I feel a little depressed between loads of laundry and dishes, as if anyone could do the mindless things that I do on a day to day basis. But then, God is kind to remind me that this IS my place. He has given me jobs to do, and now it is my turn to look to Him for joy when some days seem filled with trivial work and laps around the city on errands and carpool.

One of the nicest things that my man ever said to me was, "You are the cog that keeps us all going." I may be a hidden part of the world, but it matters, at least to my family, that I do the tasks I've been given with a smile.







May I be FOUND a good and faithful servant when it is all said and my tasks are done.