"Humility is perfect quietness of heart. It is to expect nothing, to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised. It is to have a blessed home in The Lord, where I can go in and and shut the door, and kneel to my Father in secret, and am at peace as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and above is trouble." - Andrew Murray
I love this quote that I discovered in Joanna Weaver's Having a Mary Spirit. I'm working on applying the concept to my life when we are all together in the family car and there is no room of quiet solitude to escape to. I'm trying to find the quiet space within.
I hope to walk in peaceful humility this week as we take the family to Disney. Our family is excited, packed (finally), and on the road. It took thirty minutes before one child asked to watch a movie, and one hour before the first child asked for a snack, what was for lunch, and what was for dinner.
We have already had quite a few squabbles in the process of getting on the road to our vacation destination, and two devotional talks on "doing all things without grumbling and complaining". One shed tears over a costume that didn't fit right. One disliked the shorts I had bought her. Several fought over the colors of dollar store earbuds and selection of water bottles. One swore that her bag of chips had less than a sister's bag. Disputes over personal space in the middle seat. A large scale dispute arose over who should get to sleep on the top bunk. A recounting of who has slept in the top bunk on every other occasion. Pouting that could win an Oscar over which DVD to watch... And frustration over the scratched bits.
Jesus is helping me examine my own response to childishness, ingratitude, and frustration. I want to walk in peace among my "sheep". Last night I thought my own top was going to blow as I sorted through drawers and closets looking for children's socks that I knew I had purchased, and washed, but that had mysteriously disappeared when it was time to actually pack them in the suitcase. I found lots of clothes carelessly shoved into drawers with no sense of order. And soon, my attention was riveted on on the things my kids do wrong that I have taught them about, instead of all the things they do right and the great people that they are becoming. I felt anger that my kids don't care about things that I care about, like cleanliness and order, even though I've tried to teach organizational skills.
My friend's family recently had to sit their daughters down and have a family forum. The topic of the meeting was "We are not slackers." These types of conversations are common in our household as well. When the kids fight or use unkind words they get a lecture from us about how that kind of behavior is not consistent with our family values. We are trying hard to form a family identity and culture that honors God and one another.
The tricky thing seems to be actually living out what we say we know. There needs to be some trying meeting ummmph before we get triumph!
Headphones are now on. The unhappy are quieted understanding that they will have the next pick. And one day, I hope to send them to "Third World" as comedian Tim Hawkins jokes so that they will understand what they are squabbling about is not that important anyway. In the meantime, maybe I will grow a little too.
Here's a little comic relief from Tim's Insanitized DVD.
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