Jane's new spine

Here is a picture of my sweet mother-in-law post surgery. What you see are all the screws that are keeping her spine in line.

We pray for a speedy recovery (over the next year) and give thanks that all went well.

When was the last time I paused and thanked God that I can stand, or sit, or walk without pain?

 

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Do the hard work of getting along

Do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor.

James 3:18 MSG

Real wisdom, God's wisdom begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced. You can develop a healthy robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor. (James 3: 17-18 MSG)

Is that a tall order for families, or what?

How do I teach my children to be peace-loving, considerate, and submissive, when it is in everyone's nature to fight for their "rights"?

"What is the source of wars and quarrels among you?" (James 4:1)

My kids start the day like this: best buds. A tangle of arms and legs and hugs.

Five minutes later there is an all out war over whose turn it is on the computer, how to correctly play a computer game, or who ate the last portion of a favorite cereal.

One of my children added a screen saver to her iPod that said "Did you ask first?" in order to remind certain family members of common courtesy.

How do I love purely, and correct in a way that is impartial and sincere. Is there anything gentle and reasonable about family conflict?

Some days I just want to hide in the closet and eat chocolate bars. Sigh.

"All my longings lie open before you , O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you." (James 4:3)

Father, walk with us today. Holy Spirit, teach us moment by moment how to live and love your way, "overflowing with mercy and blessings". Our way can be full of pride and frustration. Help us to be "brave" and do the hard work of getting along.

Fate be changed. Look inside. Mend the bond torn by pride.

 

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Summer Fun Camp Out

Our kids enjoyed camping in the backyard tonight. Our neighbors loaned us their tent and we were able to keep tabs on them by glancing out our window. Ahhh....happiness for all...except for maybe our neighbors who got to listen to us squeal.

 

 

What's a sleepover without an epic battle of some sort?

Or s'mores ?

 

 

The girls first experience on a "sleeping porch".

The kids had fun playing find the glow stick when the sun went down.

See childhoodbeckons.com blog for other fun ideas.

 

They look so peaceful when they are all asleep! In moments they will be up raring to go. I'm going to go tiptoe to the kitchen and make some coffee.

 

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Family

I can hear little voices talking into the night above me. My door is locked and I am done parenting for the night (unless someone is vomiting or bleeding). We don't have to be anywhere first thing in the morning, and in the spirit of summer, I am done policing. My husband is at a deacons meeting. I have lit a Gardenia candle, climbed in the covers, polished off a Ghiradelli chocolate toffee bar and will need to do some extra cardio tomorrow, but as for today, I have clocked out.

Serotonin now!

I am participating in the Beth Moore James Biblestudy with some girls at my church. This first week of the study focused on James the person, so that we could better understand James' message. I think about young Jesus sharing a bed with his younger half-brothers talking late into the night. I wonder what they talked about. I wish Scripture told us more about those early years. It doesn't comfort me that there were ugly squabbles and misunderstandings in the families of Scripture. It does fill me with hope that in the end, James was devoted to his brother (who also happened to be his God). I pray that our kids will be as fiercely devoted to one another when all is said and done, even if it takes some squabbles and misunderstandings to get there.

Tonight as I was folding laundry, I asked the kids to pray for my friend, Miss Brenda, who is grieving the loss of her beloved husband. This opened the door for six-year-old Will to tell me, in his limited English, that sometimes he is sad that his (biological) father got to see him when he was a baby, but he never got to know him. I told him how God had a plan, and had given him a new Daddy, a forever Daddy to love and care for him. The next thing he said surprised me. "Why didn't you come get me when I was a baby?" I explained that we didn't know him yet, and that we didn't see his picture until last year on the computer from the hosting program. But as I thought about it, I realized that God had prepared my heart for him EXACTLY AT THE SAME TIME HE WAS BORN. I began mysteriously weeping over adoption when we had Mary Jayne...almost seven years ago...and they were born two days apart. Even though it would be years before he would stay in our home, and become a part of our family, God was already preparing a home for him. Amazing God.

Later in the evening I was trying to untangle a series of stubborn knots in my daughter's necklace. The delicate chain of her cross necklace had become a jumbled mess. I picked at it with pins. I googled what else to do, I doused it with baby oil, and sat for an hour in frustration. Then I remembered to pray. Not long after that Will came and sat beside me and wanted me to read him a (fourth) book. I told him to pick out a book and wait for me, that I would come soon. "I will pray, Mommy." and so Will prayed in essence that God would help me untangle Mary Jayne's necklace quickly (so that I could hurry up and get on to the more important business of reading more bedtime stories). That made me smile. His honesty, how his true motivation was very obvious, but also how he has already learned that when we are in a tangled mess, we stop and pray...something that I had taught him, but had forgotten to do.

Sometimes I feel guilty that we are not using some methodical curriculum to teach our children to know and love God. It seems like a good Christian family would be a little more proactive. And yet, I delight in God's daily teachable moments. "In Him we live, and move and have our being." We talk about things in the mini-van, on-the-go, like yesterday, when my eight year old asked why his good friend had moved away (last year). On our everyday route we talked about divorce and infidelity, and how we are committed to loving God's way, and how he could count on us to keep our commitment to God and each other because Jesus helps us want to do what's right. I am blown away by the moments God gives in the rush and craziness of family life...in the mini-van "along the road".

 

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Write these commandments on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them wherever you are, sitting at home, or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to the time you fall into bed at night. Deuteronomy 6:5-7

I am thankful also for sweet Megan who brought us dinner tonight.

I am thankful for how handsome my husband looks with little bits of weeds stuck to his sweaty brow, and how he is often the first one to be counted on to help when help is needed. Thank you, God, for giving us a church family to love and be loved by as well.

 

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Mommy Boot Camp

"So-and-so is a baby!"

My peaceful, joy-filled morning was interrupted by a breakfast barrage of name-calling.

Boys! On your knees! That will be fifty push-ups.

I am going to have the strongest boys in town, if their push-up regimen matches their strong wills and fiery tempers for much longer.

We did talk about proper form. Maybe they'll rock the fitness world when they're 20.

My exercise-reluctant preteen is now tearing up the treadmill, when we came up with a contract of walking for a back-to-school shopping spree. She who couldn't make it off the couch last week spent a total of two hours walking and watching a favorite preteen movie. I was thrilled.

My littlest likes to shake her tail feathers, so we bought the Rio soundtrack from iTunes and do our rendition of the Brazilian samba around the living room. Ohhhhh-oh-wah-oh-wah-oh-wah!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wcdyahv_NY&feature=youtube_gdata_player





It's not exactly methodical, but hopefully we are installing some healthy values. We don't hurt one another with our mouths. We don't sit on the couch all summer, even if you are reading a fabulous book. We don't watch tv all afternoon, when there are so many fabulous books to read....and so on.

I hope that underneath all the "no's", they can one day see the heart of "yes!" behind the seemingly no-fun moments of Mommy Boot Camp. Yes! Let's bake cookies after we finish chopping the salad. Yes! Let's spend the afternoon at the pool after Mom teaches at the gym. Yes! You can have a friend over to shoot nerf guns (as long as you shoot them outside). Kiddos, may you know you are loved even if I have to be a Mommy sergeant to keep the seven of us in line.

 

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The Mentos Experiment

A friend of mine was sharing the other day that she never really knew what was going to set her son off on any given day. She used the illustration of dropping Mentos into a 2-liter of diet soda and watching the whole thing blow sky-high. After one summer hosting, one winter hosting, and a month together in our adoption process, we can relate.

Now that we've been to the movies and the pool, what else cam we do before dinner?

 

We have so many beautiful moments together.

 

Then there are the floodgates of tears or anger when someone feels neglected or offended, or left out. We battle weird displays of entitlement, and delight in moments of gratitude. We are learning to love. Learning that our family believes in forever love, forever commitment, and it's taking forever to let those truths sink in!

We trust in our Forever God who leads us, day by day.

 

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6:58 am

The Lord has been good to me. The boys slept in until 6:58am. I almost feel sane. Our days have been punctuated with bouts of loving and bouts of fighting and crying. There is an emotional drain just like there is an emotional high when you see a sweet smile, or feel little arms around your neck, or hear the words (occasionally), "thanks, Mom". Parenthood is not for the faint of heart.

Going to the gym for physical and mental health

Attitude adjustments for all

Yesterday night I sat in my car alone in the parking lot of Kroger listening to the rain fall on the windshield. I needed to go in and buy groceries, but I just couldn't give up the opportunity to sit in quiet and let the rain fall all around me, washing out the noise, and adjustment stress. Renewed, I was able to return to the task of loving with a smile and not a scowl.